Anything that has a start also has an end. A fresh romantic relationship initially blooms beautifully and with time as the sweetness fades, people tend to fall apart from one another. With the right person, romantic relationships always keep growing and empowering. However, breakups are the natural aftermath of all relationships if we love and expect romance from the wrong person. A dumper usually breaks up with the dumpee, prioritizing physical, mental, and emotional separation with their partner.
In this context, if you ask whether a dumper misses his/her ex, then I would say, No, a dumper usually does not miss their ex or dumpee if they make a conscious decision. However, in some cases, a dumper may start missing their ex, a bit later as months pass by.
As rightly said by most relationship coaches and experts, as soon as the dumpee stops missing their ex, the dumper starts missing their dumpee! So, if you want to know and develop a piece of in-depth knowledge about this relationship equation between a dumper and a dumpee, you are on the right page. In this article, we will discuss all the HOWs, WHYs and WHENs of emotional missing between two partners after a breakup.
When Does A Dumper Start Missing Their Ex?
To understand the answer to the above question, let's start with understanding the root cause of a breakup. Usually, a person breaks up with their partner, when they feel the spark dies out, when one person outgrows another, or simply one falls out of love with another.
Whatever the reason is behind a breakup, the dumper often moves on the way before making an official breakup statement. They try to seek happiness and spark out of their relationship through hobbies, careers, or in some cases, other people. During this phase, the person feels no more in alignment with the mindset, interest, and actions of their partners and the basis of the relationship eventually dies.
However, the dumper may miss the memories they made with their ex. The time they spent together, adventures, enjoyment, growth with a beloved partner always have strong emotions of both the person involved.
Breaking up with a partner is not always a wrong decision or bad thing that society often tries to highlight. A breakup can be a good decision for some people. The lessons learned and the emotional pains often help people to learn from past mistakes that ultimately result in self-growth.
It is natural for a person to miss another. Especially when both the partners have spent such a beautiful time in the past. However, that never signals a dumper wanting to rebound or get back into a relationship with the dumpee again.
However, if the breakup was a mess where cheating was a conscious choice made by the dumpers, chances of regrets and missing the dumpee are heavy!
The dumpers will miss the dumpee badly when they understand their past mistake. They will regret the decision of leaving a genuine partner for selfish reasons or unconscious choices.
Reasons Behind A Dumper Missing Their Ex
If you face a situation where your ex or the dumper in your relationship claims to miss you or comes back crying, it is time to handle the situation with maturity.
If you still have a soft corner for this person, try to take some time and understand why they claim to miss you. It is never a wise decision to jump back into a relationship with them or proceed with a revenge mentality to make your dumper suffer from hurts and wounds this time.
These points below may be the reason why the dumper may claim that they miss the dumpee.
When The Dumpers Fails To Rebound
The dumpers may have broken their relationship with the dumpee as they grew out of love and rebounded with some other person. This is a common situation in modern relationships. Most expert relationship coaches say that dumpers fall out of love and try to find more options in love to explore. However, when they fail again and the rebounding does not work out, dumpers try to connect with their ex, using the “I miss you” code.
If They Are Tired Of Being Single
Relationships, especially the romantic ones that we share with our beloved partners, acts as close support systems in our lives. A breakup may sometimes feel like the right choice. However, when any difficult situation like financial crisis, losing family members, job loss surges up in our lives, we often miss our previous partners (if single). The dumpers may miss a support system while facing such challenges in life and thus connects back with the dumpee.
They Are Suffering From Depression
Depression, anxiety, and mental stress are a modern-day global epidemic. Social media platforms, excess availability of information, and connection with countless people through the web have left many among us distracted and ungrounded from real lives.
We try to get involved in trends and visually appealing content and people who though seem fun initially, but over time drains us. This is what leads to mental stress and depression. If a dumper breaks up prioritizing such unconscious choices over their partners, chances are they will come back after months or maybe years after tasting depression due to the same.
The Dumper Watch You Changed And Moving On
Breakups are very painful to deal with. Losing or separating from a beloved partner with whom we have spent months or years becomes our lifestyle. It is hard to process the wounds and heartbreak that follows due to a breakup. However, the lessons learned by a dumpee are now lines of wisdom.
He/she has now healed and is shining with the radiance of self-love and growth. As we know, the shine catches all eyes! When a dumper finds the dumpee moving on, and doing great and shining with newfound radiance, it will attract them back. When a dumper finds the dumpee changed, they may end up texting “I miss you honey” texts.
If They Realize They Made Wrong Decision In The Past
Poor success in newer relationships often makes dumpers taste the reality. A few glasses of bitter wine on visually attractive dates are perfect for dumpers to realize and regret their past decision of losing a genuine partner sometimes. This is right when a dumper realizes that the previous relationship was maybe not as bad as they thought it was. They could have worked on it with their partner before walking away.
Why Does A Dumper Need To Be Hurt Or Suffer To Miss Their Dumpee?
Now you know that a dumper may miss their dumpee in challenging situations and life lessons. But, for many people, a question sprouts about the importance of a dumper to feel hurt before realizing one’s mistake or past regrets.
If you walk through a breakup scene again, you may find how a dumper always portrayed their partner in a negative light. It seemed suddenly a blooming healthy relationship is covered up with all negative energies. There was nothing left that may have any positive aspect to it.
Mindset changes, emotions fade, love withers, and relationships between two beautiful people fall apart. The perception of the dumper often becomes toxic, dull, and suffocating, which makes them dump their partner and walk away in search of something or someone better.
These breakups are a result of poor thinking patterns and unhealed traumas that dumpers keep projecting on dumpees. However, once they dump their partner and moves on with life, more challenges surround them and life gets worse and realizations struck them hard right in the face.
It is better than a dumpee accepts the situation and work on themselves and heal from the wounds created by a wrong person. For the dumpee, it is a golden chance to get better and move stronger in their lives.
It is hard for the dumper to gulp in his/her ego and come to confess to you about their regret. Thus, it will often require a strong situation to penetrate their ego and make them contact you back and confess their honest feelings about you. This is exactly why a dumper often needs to suffer a tough life lesson.
Before approaching the dumpee with the ‘miss you’ code, the dumper needs to:
- Give up his/her ego-self and approach from a place of apology or self-realization.
- Maybe tasted their own bitter medicine of rejection.
- Accept all current reality checks that life throws at them.
- Have to accept that certain situations can not be fixed any further as the dumpee may have moved on in their life already.
So in case your dumper texts “I miss you” or claims the same by any other means, know that a challenging situation has shaken them to see the truth about the past breakup.
How To Respond To A Dumper, Who Claims To Miss You?
It is true and natural for a dumper to miss a dumpee at a certain point in life. No matter what may be their reason for this sudden realization or claim, it is better for a dumpee to always speak and act their truth.
A dumpee may or may not move on by the time when a dumper tries to connect back. But, it is never wise to get back into a broken relationship, especially after a tragic breakup.
Two-person need not necessarily be evil individually to break up. Sometimes it is just that we are not able to work it out with the other for various reasons and it is completely normal. However, missing your partner need not necessarily mean that coming back together will solve all problems.
As a dumpee, you may respond with sheer maturity and understanding, acceptance and support as a friend, and make things healthy even though the breakup was tragic. All of us need to heal no matter how difficult the past was.
A mature and understanding response to your ex or dumper can help the equation between both of you restart as a healthy friendship. This approach often heals the dumper from a past mistake, regret, and life challenges.
So, instead of responding with an “I miss you too”, communicate clearly and be supportive as a friend. But if your relationship was way too bitter and you had a tragic breakup and would not like to accept any apology from your dumper, stick with your truth.
Forgive your dumper for their past decision, learn your lesson, heal from the breakup, and set clear boundaries. This will not only help you move forward as a healed person but also stop more people of similar mindsets from entering your life.
Acting from a place of self-awareness and validating one’s own emotions can save dumpees from further heartbreaks. Despite these all discussions, I would say, dumpers apologizing or saying that they miss you is rare. But if you desperately want your ex back click here to check out this video presentation which will help you with some mind-bending secrets that will surely get your ex to regret the decision, start wanting to talk to you, and hang out with you.
But if that rare incident happens to you, I hope this article enables you to understand, accept, handle and respond to the situation wisely and maturely. A breakup is never easy to handle. But, the wisdom it brings with itself makes us stronger and better for further future endeavors.