How To Know When It’s Time To Leave A Relationship?

Ahiri Chakraborty
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Relationships are a crucial part of everyone’s life, making bonds with other human beings so deep that we call it love and we have often seen people do things in love which they wouldn’t do otherwise. But not all relationships we get into throughout our lives last, we make several bonds and only one of them lasts till the end of time for everyone. However, ending a bond, be it a friendship or a relationship is never easy for anyone. 

So exactly how to know when It’s time to leave a relationship? Emotional or physical abuse is, of course, a red flag that a relationship should be ended. Also If you feel deeply that your partner no longer values you and they taking you for granted are clear signs that it’s time to move on.

Even when we know it’s time to get out of a toxic relationship we often tell ourselves to hold on and live with hope for a better future, especially in long-term relationships.

It is good to have hope but it is worse to hold on to something already broken and dead. There are always signs to know when a relationship is going to work or not, or if it’s worth putting more effort into. Read the signs Listed to understand whether or not you should keep going with your partner or if it’s time to move ahead in life: 

When To End A Relationship? 

If you’ve ever seen a romantic comedy, you’ve probably seen two people who find a way to be together despite the hurdles they face. The explanation is usually the same: they’re in love. Off-screen, though, love might not be enough to keep a relationship going. Let’s look at the signs to look at when you feel that it’s better the end a relation: 

Communication Is The Key! 

Communication is one of the most important factors in any relationship, communicating your needs, wants, expectations clearly in a relationship is the topmost thing you can do to save a drowning relationship. If you and your partner don’t communicate about how you feel or have stopped communicating for a long time and still resist or are never in the mood to, maybe then it’s time that you take a step forward towards the separation with your partner. 

Your Requirements Aren’t Being Met

Everyone has different expectations and needs in a relationship, be it an emotional need, physical need, or social need. For say, you are someone who likes to spend quality time with your partner but your partner needs their time alone, in the said situation no one is wrong or right but both the partners have to adjust according to the other’s needs. 

One person adjusting according to the other all the time will result in conflicts and if you are the one adjusting all the time even after communicating your needs, it simply means they are not willing to sacrifice or are taking your emotional needs for granted. It’s better to let them know directly about how you feel about these certain things, if it doesn’t work, then this is another sign of a toxic relationship. 

You Do Not Feel Valued

This is similar to the point above but important to understand. In a relationship, you want to feel loved, appreciated, and understood, that’s the reason why we choose to invest our hours and feelings with that one particular person. When in a relationship, there is unhealthy criticism, guilt trips, or basically any type of emotional abuse then it means you are with the wrong person. 

When there is no emotional support and you are always unappreciated for whatever efforts you put in or things you do, when your partner’s “things and work and life” is more important than yours, when they no longer cherish you, it’s definitely a sign of a toxic relationship. 

When There Is Abuse Involved

No matter how much he/she loves you, no matter how well they treat you, if there is any kind of hurt, namely, emotional, physical, verbal, or sexual abuse involved, it simply is a no-no. A person who loves you will not harm you and scare you forever. Be it a spur of the moment or anger issue, no matter what they do to treat you, if it happened once, it’ll happen again, and no person who genuinely loves you will hurt you in such ways. 

Taking care of yourself and your health is the most important thing for any human and if your partner is the one hindering that in life then sorry to break it to you, they are definitely not “the one”. 

Emotional abuse is when someone uses their emotions to dominate, humiliate, condemn, criticize, or otherwise manipulate another person. In general, a relationship is considered emotionally abusive when there is a pattern of abusive remarks and aggressive behavior that impairs an individual’s self-esteem and mental health.

When They Hold You Back From Growing 

Growing in life is important, be it in your career or as a person, when your partner starts to hinder the path towards your growth, it is not a good sign. When every time you want to go somewhere or meet people or get a promotion at work, it becomes a matter to them, a matter for arguments and unpleasant mood in the house.

Knowing that your growth is just as important as theirs is the first thing to keep in mind. Talk with them directly, ask them what the problem is, ask them why a good thing for you is bothering the peace in the house, if there are still no solutions then it’s definitely time that you look forward to your life ahead without this person. 

It’s an issue if you’re unhappy and unsatisfied all of the time. Respect your emotions, and figure out what’s wrong and fix it. You won’t be happy in your life or in your relationship until you do, particularly if your unhappiness comes from within.

When You Live In The Future

You don’t live in the future any more than you do in the past. You might want for a brighter tomorrow, but you must live in the present. If the only thing keeping you together is the prospect of a brighter future, the relationship isn’t exactly stable. The future you want is one of many possibilities, a possibility that may or may not come to pass. It’s risky to stake the relationship’s future on something that may or may not happen. When an unstable foundation gives way, a structure will come crashing down in an unpleasant manner.

When You Justify Their Actions 

Whenever we are in love with a person, we figure a way to justify all their actions. It’s truly said that love is blind, as it makes us see the good things and ignore the bad things in our partners. These bad things or habits can often be too toxic for you and your mental health.

One being in love goes to great lengths and puts so much effort into a person and when these efforts are not reciprocated, it can deeply hurt you. To avoid the hurt of accepting the facts, we start giving reasons and excuses to justify their actions. This is what neglecting the facts and lying to yourself is, making excuses for your partner’s actions, and justifying their bad habits is how you live in a lie and surround yourself with fake vibes. 

When you see yourself justifying all their wrong deeds to yourself and the world, know that it is them who need to work on themselves. And it is a solid sign that they are a toxic match and you should consider breaking up with them. 

You're Afraid To Ask For More

All this time we’ve been talking about communicating your needs, communicating how you feel and what you want from your relationship, but if the case is that asking for more makes you scared of your partner, or if you are always scared that an argument will occur if you ask for something or some efforts from them, then it’s definitely not a sign of the healthy relationship. 

It doesn’t mean you ask and ask and not give in return, make sure the needs and wants of both the partners are balanced And that is when you can call it a healthy relationship, where both are equal, equally important, and your communications about your needs are clear. Being afraid to ask for something you need as a person just shows a lack of communication and understanding which will make it hard for you to stay with that person. 

When Your Core Principles And Beliefs Are Incompatible

There must be some similarity in underlying principles for any friendship or connection to work. The big rocks that will keep the friendship in place are agreement in these values. Even if other things are different, the relationship will be able to weather even the worst storms ahead because of the giant rocks.

On the other side, even if everything else is the same, it doesn’t matter if your underlying principles are fundamentally different. It will only become more difficult to keep the partnership together. It’s the same as trying to keep the soil on the ground together after a strong downpour. Without the tree’s base to hold the soil together, everything will crumble despite your best attempts.

How To Get Out Of An Unhealthy Relationship? 

It’s never simple to end a relationship. No one enjoys ending a relationship. Still, you should stop toxic relationships as soon as possible so that you can go on with your life.

Even when you’ve figured out how to evaluate your relationship and figure out when to leave a relationship, taking action might be challenging. Finding the guts to end a relationship ultimately comes down to making a decision and changing an important part of your daily life. You’ll expose your inner confidence and be able to get out of this toxic relationship once and for all the right reasons. 

  • Make a promise to yourself. Decide to put an end to it once and for all. It will not be an easy task. Your faith in yourself will see you through.
  • Recruit the help of family and friends. Notify your friends and family about your imminent breakup. Determine how they can assist. Perhaps you’ll require assistance with your relocation. When you’re feeling down, you might need some encouragement. Make sure you have a safety net in place before you need it. They’ll want to help you out.
  • Make no attempt to be pals. Following the split, you’re unlikely to have a happy relationship. There will be resentment and damaged sentiments that must be addressed. You might be able to be pleasant once the emotional dust has settled. However, that isn’t your immediate objective.
  • Do not feel obligated to save your lover. Your partner will surely be hurt by the breakup. You won’t be able to stop it from happening. You are not in charge of his or her feelings. Doing this and caring for their feelings and putting yours first for once might feel too much and you may want to help them too but you got to remember, life is about you now, they sure still mean a lot to you but you have to make things about you from now on. 
  • Fill the void. following the split, you'll have a lot of free time. Consider how you can put it to good use. Attend a class. Participate in voluntary work. Join a fitness center. Your kitchen should be redecorated. You'll meet new people and feel better about yourself as a result. Remember why you broke up with them, it’s important to keep telling yourself that you are important and so is your mental health. 
  • Strengthen yourself. You feel absolutely unstoppable when you feel empowered. Learn how to improve your self-talk and replace negativity with optimism to become more empowered. Replace unhealthy habits with good ones, such as exercising, eating well, and taking care of yourself. To set intentions and boost focus, use priming. You’ll become more confident in your decisions as a result of empowering rituals, and you’ll know when to quit a relationship.

We know it’s hard to go through a breakup, to leave someone you have invested your everything into, but if it’s an unhealthy partnership and costing you your mental peace, then it’s probably time to move ahead and be open for new opportunities and rides in life. Strengthen yourself and don’t look back to let yourself grow! 

Related Queries:

How do you tell if he wants to end a relationship?

He signs, read the signs. When you are no longer the priority, when mental and emotional abuse is the only way of communication between you two, even if they don’t want to say or even accept that the relationship is over, read the signs and accept that it’s not healthy to work on it anymore. 

When should you not break up? 

The question will come to your mind a lot at this phase of your relationship. Since you have invested your time and efforts into building a relationship with this person, have second thoughts is a very common thing. If you are not 100% sure that you can’t make it work, If you haven’t communicated your issues with them and things can still work out, then don’t, don’t break up. Put in the effort, if it doesn’t work even after you do everything from your end then you know it’s time to move on. 

How do I break up with someone I love?

It’s always difficult to break up with someone you love, do not make a rash decision, communicate your true feelings with them and let them know that you are willing to put in the efforts to make it work. If even after that you mutually decide to break up, then it’s time you accept the fact that it wasn’t meant to be. Acceptance is the key, you’ll move on with time as long as you accept the facts. 

What is a toxic relationship? 

A toxic relationship is when you have more hurtful experiences than good ones. A relationship where you don’t feel appreciated or loved and when you are the only one making efforts and holding it together. 
Of course, mental/physical and emotional abuse are the clear signs of a toxic relationship, be it a friendship or a romantic relationship. 


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