You don’t know when you are going to fall in love. It does not come with an announcement. We have seen how Julia Roberts fell in love with Hugh Grant in Notting Hill. Did Julia Roberts’ character ever imagine that a famous Hollywood star like her could ever fall in love with a small bookshop owner? Probably no.
And that’s the magic of love. You don’t know when it and how it happens. But we all know that when it happens, we experience the most special days of our life.
Don’t you agree with me?
So clearly love has no age. You can fall in love when you are in seventh grade or when you are in college. Love can find you in your late thirties too.
But relationships are not quite easy. It takes a huge amount of effort and commitment to have a successful relationship
It becomes especially difficult when you are young and still in middle school. You are just too immature to handle the complexities of a relationship.
That is why middle school relationships mostly fail and usually do not last long. The average time span for a middle school relationship is 1 year to a maximum of 1.5 years. Some even are shorter than this.
Due to the fragile nature of middle school relationships, people often disregard these relationships.
For many, it is just a part of their school life where they shared some special moments with one friend but it lacks the depth of an actual relationship.
So, Do Middle School Relationships Count?
The answer is: No. Most middle school relationships fail and don’t make it to even high school. This is a temporary phase. Teenagers often do not let it make an effect later in their life.
The harsh truth is middle school relationships are often looked at as just casual and childish. You have to admit. You are not mature at this age. You do not have enough life experiences to judge what’s or who’s good for you or not. So the chances of a long-lasting middle school relationship become fewer.
All relationships are unique: your silly school days one to the one when you’re happily married. So whether it lasts or not, it counts or not, the specialty will still be there.
So let us explore some interesting aspects of a middle-school relationship.
How Can You Know That You Are In A Relationship In Your Middle School?
It starts with the friendship certainly. And then it moves forward to the next step. Out of all the students in your school, your heart only skips when you see him or her. The next moment you find yourself restless if you don’t get to see him or her for one day even.
You wait for that one single moment to catch a glimpse of her/him.
So when the two of you finally tell each other that it’s something more than a friendship, you two admit that you are in a relationship.
When Do Middle School Boys/Girls Realize That They Are In Love?
As I said before, love is like a breath of fresh air, it’s your comfort zone, it’s your happy place. And you never actually know when you will be hypnotized by its charms. So even if you’re a girl of 14, you can find your Prince Charming in the boy with whom you share your books.
Believe me, it all starts with these little moments. You can even consider them silly. But we must consider the age. You have literally stepped into the world. You are learning new things, exploring the world, making friends, loving and unloving things every day.
So, if you find that girl special who quietly sits at the back and does all her homework attentively, there’s nothing stupid about it. Our hearts have their own ways of dealing with feelings.
Let me share an example of one of my childhood friend’s middle-school relationships. When I asked Martha- “How did you know that you were in love with that guy?”
She said, “I loved the way he solved all my Maths problems and helped me to study better.” Martha could always go to Robin to discuss the study without any hesitation. And according to Martha, that was the beginning of their solid friendship.
Martha also told me that it was not just because Robin was helpful. But also his sweet behavior. He never got irritated if Martha wanted the explanation of the problem a few more times. He even got Martha chocolate when she scored an “A” in the Maths exam.
These are the little things that made Martha’s heart fall for this guy.
You can see now, there are no extraordinary things here. Nobody went for a fancy date. Nobody dressed up to impress each other. Nobody showed off their skills.
It was a pure exchange of feelings that led two teenagers to fall in love with each other.
But Why Do Middle-School Relationships Fail?
Although initially, it seems all hunky-dory between the two, things do turn upside down as time progresses. There are a lot of things that do not work in favor of middle-school relationships.
- You have to study and complete all your assignments on time. In the midst, of all these, your relationship often takes a backseat and does not get the love and attention it requires.
- Most people mistake friendship for love. You initially think that your friendship is very special and different from the rest of your friendships. Bt slowly as you second more time, you feel you two are better off as friends only.
- You are too casual about the relationship. Often girls/boys take their middle school relationships quite casually. Their intention is to just have some fun time, post cute pictures on social media, show off to their friends, and act cool. They hardly care about the relationship. It’s just a fling for them. This lack of seriousness and thoughts leads to failure most often.
- Your feelings change rapidly. Teenagers have the most variable emotion in them. They feel love, jealousy, sadness, happiness, anger all at the same time. And because of their immature age, they can’t handle all these emotions together. So you might think “ She is the girl of my dream” in the first month of your kiddish relationship, but her presence can start irritating you in the sixth month. Or you might just find a hot-looking senior in your high school and shrug off your middle-school relationship in a jiffy.
These are all the negative factors that play a major role in deciding the future of a middle school relationship.
Now I have a question for all of you. Should you count your middle-school relationship?
You are in your college and you have found a beautiful girl whom you really like. You want to have a serious relationship with her. Will you bring up your middle-school relationship while talking to her? Or you would just dust it off as a silly teenage mistake.
It depends on you. Your thoughts will determine whether that middle-school relationship you had when you were 14, actually made an impact in your life or not.
You can be honest with your partner and tell them about your middle-school relationship as a joke. You might find that your partner too jas the same story tell you. Then both of you can discuss the silly things you did at that age and have a good time laughing about it.
Some boys/girls prefer not to disclose their past middle-school relationships. Simply because for them it was just a casual phase. They were not serious about it and they knew it had no future. So they really do not count it as a relationship at all. Thus, they do not bother to mention it to their present partner.
Now, Let’s Come Back To Martha. Could Martha And Robyn Make It?
Sadly, no. They had a fulfilling relationship till their high school and after that, both chose different ways.
So now when I ask Martha about the feelings of her middle-school relationship she says, “ It was pretty fun. We chatted, treated each other with icecreams. I don’t have any bitter feelings about it. It was a part of my teenagehood just like thousand other things”.
Does Martha count that relationship as a real one? Again No. She directly told me “As soon as I entered high school, my whole world changed. I realized that was just a stupid relationship. We were not really emotionally connected to each other on a high level from where we could think of a possible future”.
Martha, my friend, is happily married to Willam now. And guess what, William knows about this phase of Martha’s life and he is totally chilled with it. In fact, William shared his brief story of romance of six months with a girl when he was in sixth grade.
Clearly, both of them do not count their middle-school relationship and laughs it out whenever they think about it.
Does No Middle-School Relationship Last?
Exceptions are always there. Your childhood sweetheart can be your forever partner. Couples who are together from middle school and it resulted in marriage, have said that it was not a cakewalk. They faced many difficulties, ups, and downs but they made sure to hold onto each other no matter what.
So, if you are in a middle-school relationship, both of you must be clear about your wants. Do you both want to walk the marriage aisle together in the future? If yes, then resolve your issues, don’t fight over silly things, have faith in each other and you are bound to have a romantic story of your own.
I have already written an article on How Long do Typical Middle-School Relationships Last where you can find awesome tricks to make your relationship last longer.
But if it fails, don’t lose your heart. Love has other surprising plans for you. Your middle-school relationship will remain as a sweet chapter from a romantic novel in your memories forever.
Oh, by the way, don't forget to share your sweet and bitter stories with us in the comment sections below. Believe us, we all love a good love story. By the way, who doesn’t?