She Left Me For Someone Else, Will It Last?

Nishtha Tutlani
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Most of the time when a person leaves one person for another, it is because the new person provides them with something that the former person could not give them. It could be emotional stability, good communication, or a healthy relationship altogether. Or the person could cheat on you with someone else.

Whatever be the reason, it always hurts to be replaced by someone else. It hurts so much that the person with whom you shared your everything until some days ago is not there for you anymore, and now you are left with so many things to share but no one to share with, whereas that person has not lost much, she or he now has a whole new person with whom they can share their everything. 

She left me for someone else, will it last? Yes, it will. Not to make you feel bad about yourself but maybe she chose someone else over you because she is more compatible with them than you, maybe whatever you two had with each other was not mutual and the relationship was not getting anywhere, and after a point it became toxic. 

Maybe it was not your fault, but maybe it is not her fault either, it is always better to choose someone else than being in a relationship that is toxic and stagnant, which does not help each other grow. She left you which means something did not work out between you two. And she chose someone else because it is working out with them. Maybe the new person brings her peace and comfort and that’s why she chose them over you.

Leaving for someone else is one thing, but cheating on you for someone else is the worst. If she tells you that she is leaving you because she has developed feelings for someone else then there is nothing much you can blame her with, you can not blame someone just because they decide to be with someone that is not you. 

If your partner gets involved with someone else behind your back or in simple terms, cheats on you, then there is nothing worse than they can do to you. Being cheated on is so emotionally damaging, it destroys one’s self-esteem and kills their confidence for years, getting back from which is the toughest job that there is. No apology can ever make it right. 

Nothing ever beats the feeling of being replaced by someone else, the constant feeling of being worthless, unloved, and replaceable hound you every now and then. You start to question everything in your life, you lose your self-esteem, you stop believing in love ever again, you doubt everyone who tries to come close to you, you question everything and everyone, you think if you can trust anyone ever again.

But, trust me you will. You will fall in love again and you will start trusting people again, it takes a while to get back to the groove after being broken so badly, but you will get your self-esteem back. It takes time and patience.

It takes you to put yourself first and working on your emotions to be emotionally independent so that the next time someone leaves you your world does not stop revolving for a while. 

What If It Lasts? Should I Be Bothered If It Worked? 

People come and go from people’s lives all the time. Some leave because they find the other person more compatible than the previous, and some leave because they like hopping from one person to another, and there are others who leave for reasons unknown. 

But, so what if it lasts, should you be bothered? You should not be, but you would, it will happen. You will be emotionally wrecked. It is never easy to see someone you were with/wanted to be with for so long is now with someone else. Every time you see them together and you see them happy, it will break your heart into a thousand little pieces. 

  • The key is to focus on yourself and your mental health. The key is to stop stalking your ex on social media, unfollow or block them on every platform possible, delete their number, delete their pictures, and do it for as long it is needed to forget them. 
  • Train your mind so hard that it does not bring back any memories of you two, keep controlling your mind, master over it, every time a thought pops up in your head about the past, think about something else and keep telling your mind that you do not want these thoughts back, it is going to be a hard and strenuous journey but it is going to be worth it, eventually.
  • Do not get into any bad habit, do not let the evil win, get new hobbies, do things which make you happy, practice new hobbies, learn to play an instrument or watch movies or read books, learn new stuff, keep yourself busy, and make yourself productive, get something really meaningful out of this ordeal. 
  • If you have no choice, if she is a classmate or a work colleague or someone who you cannot help but see every now and then, then the key is to 'fake it till you make it's every time you see her with her partner', pretend that you do not care, do not let go of that smile on your face, look right through her and smile, pretend as if she is just another friend of yours. 
  • Do not give in to your emotions or your mind. Keep reminding yourself that you should not care, make new friends and hang out with them, do it and keep doing it until it does not hurt anymore. 

When you do these things for long enough, you will find yourself not caring anymore after a while, it would not bother you anymore. And eventually, you will find someone else who will stay and who will give you the butterflies and who will make you happy like no one before.

Take this bad phase as an experience, you will see at the end how strong it makes and prepares you so well for the things and ordeals to come for you in the future

What If It Does Not Last? 

When we love someone we try and do everything that is in our able self to keep the person, and if even after all that it does not last and they left then one thing is for sure that leaving you was not very hard for them, so if they are gone for good then great, but if the relationship with the other person does not last and they try to come back to your life, then do not, I repeat do not go back to them, do not be a second option, second chances work but very rarely, those who leave, leave again most of the timesdo not give in to your emotions, do not get weak in front of them. 

Do everything you can to move on and eventually, you will find someone who will decide to stay no matter what, and for whom you will never be a second option.

People who come back are nothing but lonely, they always need someone by their side, does not matter, if they really loved you or if you really mattered to them then they should not have left in the first place. So, do not let them use you according to their convenience. 

So, does not matter if it lasts or if it does not, do not be bothered because it has nothing to do with you. 

"She Left Me For Someone Better Than Me", What Should You Do Now?

Feeling this way? Let us correct you, she didn’t find someone better, she found someone new. Do not think low of yourself just because your partner chose someone else over you. 

  • What should you do? Simple, focus on self-growth! Use this time to take care of yourself, prioritize yourself and treat yourself with food, music, movies, and whatever else makes you feel happy. Because, at the end of the day, people come and go but you will always be there for yourself. 
  • Take this experience as a life lesson, work on yourself so much that this does not happen to you ever again, if you think you are emotionally drowning and getting into depression, then do not hold back, go see a therapist, take professional help, it is never a shame to take help. 
  • Talking always helps and it heals, talk to a therapist. A therapist will guide you in the right direction, they will give you exercises and tasks to keep you occupied which will also help in overcoming the feeling.
  • Talk to your friends, try to mend relationships with your friends, the ones with whom you could not be in touch with because you were so busy in a relationship, believe me, or not, but friends are the best medicine out of a breakup, they will make you laugh and make you realize that your worth is way more than you think. Keep talking to people, get all those emotions out of your stomach, do not hold them all in, talking always helps. 
  • Spend time with your family, talk to your siblings or cousins, talking to elder people always helps. Elder people can be very experienced when it comes to matters of heartbreak, they can tell you things which you would have never seen coming, speak to them and they will guide you in the right direction. 
  • Focus more on your career now, if you are someone who has wasted a good deal of their time over relationships, then make sure that now that it is over, you focus more on your career and compensate for everything that you could not do. Even if you were focused before, give even more time to it, not to show anyone your worth but to yourself, breakups can work as the best or worst form of motivation. 

Use this as a stepping stone to achieving bigger things in your career. Believe in yourself and keep working hard, it will do wonders. 

FAQs:

What happened to your ex who left you for someone else or who cheated on you? 

Well, initially they got cheated on by the one they cheated me with, it was pretty sad because I know what it feels to be cheated on, we had differences but I never wanted them to go through the feeling of being cheated on. Anyway, later on they found someone really good and compatible. And they have been together for more than a year now, and they both seem pretty happy with each other. 

How do I know if she left me for someone else?

There is no easier way, you will have to bring this up with her. You will have to confront her with this question, it will be awkward but it will give you the satisfaction which will be way better than constantly living in the dilemma of what if she cheated on me and what if she did not. So, just go ahead and ask her if she left you for someone else. And whatever may be the answer, make sure you work on yourself and prioritize yourself. 

Signs she left you for someone else?

The most visible sign is when they are not as affectionate and emotionally involved with you as much as they used to be. They are more irritable now, they are constantly making excuses to not talk to you, they are not excited about things involving you, like your birthday and stuff. And, if they are constantly online, or their phone constantly shows busy but you are not the one they are talking to are some of the signs that will tell you that they left you for someone else.

Why did she leave me for someone else? 

It might or it might not last with her new partner, depending on the grounds on which she left you. Did she leave you because the relationship with you became toxic and stagnant and there was no room for you two to grow? Or did she leave because she was bored with you? Or is it because she just likes to go from one person to the other. There could be so many possible answers to this question. 

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