He Acts Like He Likes Me In Person But Never Texts Me

Adhideb Ghosh
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Initiative to connect is the key for communicating in a relationship. Meeting them in person, calling, or texting your loved one lets them know that you are present in their lives, trying to make meaningful conversations. 

So what happens when a guy who is interested in you in person never texts?

He likes you in person but never texts you because a guy does not put importance on only texting as a form of communication. A mature guy in a relationship will prefer to meet in person and spend quality time together instead of a constant texting frenzy. The purpose of texts is to deliver short messages, not meaningful dialogues.

To understand why he is not texting, the first thing to notice is his preferred mode of communication, quite often guys are bad texters or simply prefer meeting in person. 

Not all guys can be charming texters, some open up more in person as well as a plethora of other reasons.

So let’s look at the reasons a guy, who is interested, but never texts you.

The Reasons For Not Texting You

The reasons for not preferring to text are many, below are a few of the most common ones. The important lesson you take is a glimpse into the mental or physical barriers your partner faces in communicating via text.

A Bad Texter

Guys are often about physical prowess instead of intellectual conversations. We have always considered the attraction of a physical build to attract the opposite gender. 

In today’s world the trend is still the same, hence engaging in hours of talk over text can be quite challenging.

In some cases, the guy is responsible to keep a conversation going which is quite troublesome as there can only be limited topics that come to your mind. 

Thus guys tend to avoid texting and meet in person. 

Likes It Old School

Today the importance given to digital communication is way more, everything seems to be online, it’s convenient for sure but connecting in person is still way more intimate for some, instead of texting their loved one with a blank and expressionless face all day. 

Such men are often misunderstood as aloof, arrogant, or even disengaged from their partner’s lives, what we often fail to notice is that our judgment is based on our form of communication (texting). 

Some men communicate differently, some prefer to look into your eyes while saying things that they mean. 

Genuinely Busy

Men, the successful, achievers, ‘real’ men that women refer to as their type of guy, do not lie around in bed waiting to text you back.

He is genuinely busy making himself a life, hence achieving all those traits that you found desirable in him. If his focus is on texting you, all the other important things must take a step back or be compromised, which is unacceptable to any person irrespective of gender. 

What little time a genuinely busy person has should be reserved to meet in person instead of boring, meaningless, filler texts. 

So if your guy is genuinely busy making himself a life, appreciate and be understanding, remember the biggest value you bring to a successful person in life is your ability to understand the day-to-day challenges he faces. So, connect meaningfully instead of having text expectations.

He Is Not Interested

Men who do not the text should not be judged as not interested in being in a relationship, however, if the lack of communication is there for all kinds of communication then he may not be genuinely interested in you.

Do not take this personally, he may have been interested in you, but due to various reasons, he has decided otherwise. If you find a guy not initiating any contact whether via texts, calls or in person, the guy is mostly not interested to move forward. 

You may try and initiate contact just to be sure, but my advice is not to stick back and keep waiting for this one text. The world is all about finding new opportunities, so go ahead and explore!

Respects Space

A guy, who respects and understands the importance of space will not be too keen on texting.

They know how busy a day can get and do not want to impose on that space. 

Guys also understand that sometimes texts give away too much information and the relationship turns dull when there is nothing more to share. 

A call or meeting in person is also more personal and shows effort from both partners. Texting for some is all about passing small information that would take a lot of time to explain over a call.

Guys who respect their own space, as well as their partners, tend to make less yet meaningful contacts that add value to their lives. A date, where you meet in person is much more attractive to them instead of constant texting, like a teenager discovering love. 

Playing Hard To Get

There are times when a guy avoids texting to create a hard-to-get scenario, where the more he makes you wait the more you want him. Highly effective, yes, when you are a teenager. 

Every self-respecting, confident woman would not wait for a text, they have a ton of other important work to do. It’s easy to notice if a guy is genuinely busy or just playing hard to get. 

Just wait and pace your texts as well, a guy who is playing hard to get will try and initiate contact when he sees that the hard-to-get routine is not working, a genuinely busy guy will not have a schedule change just because you have stopped interacting as much. 

So choose wisely and if you don’t mind the hard-to-get routine then all is well, if you do, just move on.

The most important question that we ask ourselves is does not texting equal, not being interested? The answer is NO. Not texting can be for a lot of reasons as mentioned before. So, what are the signs that he is interested just not at texting?

Signs To Show He Is Interested

To understand his interest in you, look at the effort he is putting in. Behavioral patterns that your guy subconsciously displays give out a lot.

Stays In Touch

Your guy may not be the great texter you imagined but you have always noticed him trying to stay in touch in this own way. He may give you a call during his breaks at work or plan a date together to go to.

What matters is there is always a conscious effort of communicating from his end, even though he does not text as much. 

The Gentleman

He makes a conscious effort to make you feel comfortable. Now it may not be opening doors for every car you hop into but whenever you meet him he likes to take care of you.

He makes an effort to make your life easier and is willing to help out in your time of need. So yes, if your guy is a gentleman, and proves it by his actions then not texting should not cause you to be anxious. 

Let your insecurities go and notice the other forms of communication that your partner makes day-to-day.

The Body Language Says It All

If you are worried about his interest in you, all you have to do to verify it is by noticing his body language. Texting is a medium of communication that is limited to writing, but often writing has no credibility, actions both conscious and subconscious answer a lot more.

If he is interested in you, then his body language, the way he acts around you, will give you signs of his intentions. 

Look for them and decide for yourself if the problem lies with texting or the relationship.

The Attention Is The Same 

The smaller details in life matter, if he is paying you the same kind of attention and effort needed in a relationship, then not texting you should not play a significant barrier while communicating in your relationship.

Texting can not convey every emotion, so it's important to see if the guy pays you attention and care when he is with you instead of long-winded promises that are never fulfilled. 

If your guy is not a texter, you get more attention just not via texts but in person, trust me no one likes a person always into their mobile phones during a date. 

So these signs show you if a guy is interested in you without the texting in the equation. If you are assured that after all the checks and balances, he is good to date, then go ahead and build your way of communication.

A couple, I recently interviewed for this article has found their form of communication. To give you a bit of the back story the girl is in advertising (client servicing), with their crazy hours there is no other form of communication that can work out but texts and meetups on the weekend.

The guy on the other is not keen on texting, he feels that texting is a monotonous, detached form of communication, where the only way to express yourself is by emojis.

The girl had no way to change his way of thinking and even agreed that texting gets monotonous over a period, so how do they stay in touch?- Memes.

It may sound funny but they started sharing memes that somehow reflect their emotions or what they were going through at that moment, it was funny, interesting and kept both of them engaged in communication.

What I want you to take from this story is not about meme sharing but to have the willingness to look beyond the conventional forms of communication we use, and decide our relationships on. 

Although building your style of communications takes some trial and error, here is what you should take note of:

  • Make sure your style is comfortable for both partners. For example, you want to connect on FaceTime instead of texting, set a time comfortable for both to join in and enjoy. 
  • Make sure your style represents both you and your partner. For example, the couple in the above story started exchanging memes that resonate equally with both of them.
  • Make sure to take reference from your daily habits or day-to-day life. Your form of communication should not be dull or cumbersome for you to put across. The goal is to have a viable form of communication that does not take too much of your time and effort.
  • Make sure that both the partners agree to put in the effort to make this work. For example, if your form of communication is FaceTime you and your partner need to make an effort to set up the time to connect. 

In the end, if a guy acts as he likes you in person, it is mostly true. It is up to you to decide the importance texting has in your relationship. On a personal front finding your form of communication is much better than following the norm of just texting.

So explore more and do not equate no-texting to no-interest. Remember we all communicate differently, all you need to do is to bring yourself and your partner together in the right frequency of communicating. 


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