Last December you and your partner were at a party. You were dancing, drinking, and having a crazy time with all the college friends reunited after a year.
All was well till your best friend told you how s/he had seen your partner kissing her college sweetheart.
The sky came breaking down in front of you. You were puzzled about what to do? Would it be right to believe your best friend, or should you confront your partner to find out the truth?
All your doubts and confusion died when the news spread like wildfire among the group.
You left the party midway, and on returning home, you locked yourself in a room. The situation was unfathomable, the thought of the last night was eating you up, and you don’t know what should be the best move on your part?
I can feel the pain you are going through. Remember? As they say, Don’t make any decision when you are angry.
Yes, don’t let the situation influence your decision that you may regret later. So, let your nerve cools down, and then you can arrive at a solution.
But the good news is if you can stick to this article till the last, you would find out the best and the right move all by yourself.
Are you ready? Come on, let’s peep into the situation more closely before taking the ultimate step.
Step 1: Can Kissing Be Considered A Cheating In The Relationship?
The couples are divided in opinion while asked if kissing someone can be considered infidelity in a relationship.
While a group thinks kissing without further intimacy is not a breach of deal, others view it as an emotional deal breaker. While some may work it out and forgive their partner, others draw an end to it.
But, if you are an old-school, hopeless lover like I am, then to some extent kissing someone with a romantic intention is a violation of relationship practices.
It is a clear indication that something is off track in the relationship.
When your partner is getting romantically attracted to “another” person, and he/she won’t mind kissing them, is not throwing lights on the problems of your relationship and needs to be addressed ASAP?
To find out if kissing is cheating, you need to discuss it with your partner. Go back to your relationship laws that you both promised to abide by in your fairy-tale journey.
Once you have found that kissing is a deal-breaker in your relationship, you have to ask yourself these questions.
Step 2: Have You Seen Your Partner Kissing Someone?
Everything that you hear is not always true. No matter what your best friend told you, if you haven’t enough proof, the chances are that claims can also be false.
Who knows your best friend has an eye over your partner and wants to churn out benefits by throwing you two into the pit? After all, “Everything is fair in love and war.”
So, if you haven’t seen but heard your boyfriend kissing someone, the next right move would not be to break up but to verify the authenticity of the news.
How to ask your partner: Before that, reminding you once again, don’t let your anger overpower you. Our motive is to get the truth to make a meaningful decision.
So, once you have received the news of your partner kissing someone, don’t call them and make a scene out of it.
But ask your partner politely to meet you because you have something important to discuss that cannot happen over a phone call.
Now, when your girlfriend or boyfriend has finally met, you let him/her know that your friend had seen him/her at a party kissing someone.
Ask them if the news is true and, if true, why they had done it. Let your partner speak because you cannot call anyone guilty till they are proved to be guilty.
Now, you have a clear answer. If the news was false, congratulations to you and now fire your so-called best friend.
But what if the news is true? Okay, relationshipsortout.com has solutions to every single problem coming between you and your partner.
Step 3: Your Partner Confirmed That They Have Kissed Someone Else
If kissing someone is against your relationship ethics, then darling, you have all the right to be furious with your partner, and I can understand how much strength you need to endure the announcement.
I would love to take a few minutes before you call off the relationship that maybe both of you nurtured over months or years.
Q. How is your partner reacting to the action she/they had committed?
To err is human. I am not supporting what your partner had done, but we do something we were not supposed to do in the heat of the moment.
Try to find out the “why” behind your partner kissing another person while n a relationship.
Being a lover, you have the right to know why your partner would kiss someone. And your partner MUST help you by answering one or all the questions.
Questions You Can Ask Your Partner:
Q1: Was She/He Kissed Someone Under the Influence of Alcohol?
Anything can happen under the influence of alcohol. Make your partner understand that this is why being an adult s/he needs to be more responsible.
If your partner accepts his/her mistake and promises not to repeat the error in the future because s/he doesn’t want to ruin a beautiful relationship over such a grave mistake, will it be too hard to forgive your partner this time?
But it is a complete red flag if your partner repeats the same mistake time and again and fakes to be sorry.
Break up with our partner. They have probably kept you an option which she/he can count upon when nothing else works.
Stop reading, pick the phone, dial the number and let your partner know you have kicked him/her out of your life.
Q2: Is Your Partner Attracted to the One Whom She/He Had Kissed?
We have no control over our hearts. No matter how much in lover we are today with our irrespective partner, it would change in a blink of an eye if our heart desires someone else.
So it is highly advisable to know if your partner has kissed the other person out of any romantic intention.
If the answer is yes, brace yourself and leave the relationship behind.
I know it will be hard to go the person and all the memories back in heat of the moment with whom you have once decided to be on a journey of forever, but I believe you will be able to cope with the pain with time.
Isn’t moving on easier than being with someone who is already attracted to someone else?
Accept the reality, and maybe this time you’ll meet your prince charming or lady-love who knows your worth, and you are no less than a treasure for them.
Never forget that everything happens for good. Maybe, for the time being, you have to bear the tremendous pain, but I can vouch when you meet your soul mate; you’ll be thanking the universe for removing your ex-partner from your way.
Q3: Is Anything Missing in Your Ongoing Relationship That the Other Person Fulfilled?
We live in a world where success is measured by wealth, name, and fame. In the rat race of life, we often ignore the little things of our lives.
Maybe, in your case, you have ignored your partner long enough that s/he has found solace in other’s arms.
They craved your attention, love, and time but you were too busy to give a damn. In all this time, someone else has filled up the void for your partner.
I do not see anything wrong if your partner has moved from you to someone who cares and values their emotions. But, now that your partner has moved on from your life, something is bothering you, right?
Solutions To Your Problem
- Set your priority. Ask yourself what you want. And it’s okay if you do not want to commit to any relationship for the time being. But it is important on your half to clear the issue to your partner. You have no right to keep a person hanging while you are busy building your own world without involving your partner in it.
- If the relationship is as important as building a career, then make your partner understand that they are very precious to you, but as you are trying to make a secure future for both of you, it becomes hard for you to give the time they need. If your partner loves you, I am sure they will consider your situation. And to make your partner happy while you are busy, drop a quick text in the middle of your work, block a time in your day dedicated only to your partner.
Step 4: Your Partner Has Kissed Someone But Not Accepting The Truth
If you have enough proof that your partner has kissed someone, but he or she is not ready to accept, throw them out of your life. In a relationship, dishonesty is the biggest red flag. You are a dependable option to your partner, so they are not dumping you. Keeping you constant, they are busy exploring options available to them in the outside world.
So, why keep someone who doesn’t value our emotions?
If this is your person, bidding goodbye to your disloyal partner will be the best thing you can do to save yourself from further hemorrhage.
Special Tips If You Are Experiencing Similar Problem
- Take Time: Don’t expect that you can heal from the damage caused by your partner in a second, but remember that with days passing and focusing on yourself, the pain will start fading slowly.
Remember, as they say, “Time will heal the pain.”
- Stop Stalking: I know how hard it is to control the urge to stalk our ex. But with extra effort, you can do it. Don’t check their social media handles. Do not even check the messages you exchanged or the photos you both have taken. Stop discussing your ex with their friends. Ignore them so hard that they start doubting their existence.
- Love Yourself: It starts by dumping your disloyal partner. Today they are lying about kissing someone, and tomorrow they may keep you in the dark about a much larger problem than this. Accept the truth and let go of the trouble and the trouble-maker from your life.
Pick up the hobby you left because you were too busy to love blindly. Take the long-due trip or read the book you left unfinished. Do whatever it takes to make yourself happy.
- Meet People: Reconcile with old friends and family you overlooked for your partner. Spending time with close ones can create magic. Share your problem with your trusted friends; they have an amazing quality of giving hard-hitting solutions for every problem. Meet new people, and who knows soon when you’ll again find your heart keeper.
In this article, I have given you four angles to consider before you break up with your partner for kissing someone else. Firstly, consider if kissing is cheating in your relationship.
Once you have the answer, you must verify if your partner has kissed someone. Learn what has propelled them to kiss someone.
Lastly, what should you do if your partner lies to you even after kissing another person? Now, it is your time to make a fair decision. But, before that, I hope you have judged several aspects of the given problem.
