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Should I Date A Woman 10 Years Older Than Me?

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When it comes to dating, age, color, religion, size all are external factors that are stereotyped by society. Love is said to have no barrier to such external factors. A perfect example of it is those men who often tend to get attracted to women older than them. This phenomenon doesn’t solely come due to hormonal tickling, but in this case, hormones get deeply affected by many external factors.

But approaching women being 10 years younger than her is indeed a difficult job and many confusions and questions start surfacing the minds of men in such situations. That’s why I often face the question from my fellow men: is it wrong to date a woman who is 10 years older? Is it okay to be on a date with her? 

There’s no wrong with dating a woman 10 years older than you. But what you must remember is, all kinda dating comes with individual sets of pros and cons. You must analyze them before you date the older woman and you’ll know whether it’s right for you or not. 

However, if you are living in the air of confusion about whether to date a woman ten years older than yourself, rest assured you have arrived on the right page. 

Here is an article where I have tried to cover up maximum facts about dating older women for all my readers. 

Points You Must Consider Before Dating A Woman Older Than You

Dating is a very personal choice for every person in their life. Starting from choices, upbringing, mindset, likes, dislikes, sexuality, career, and every other intricate detail play a crucial role in the communion of two people be it a marriage or dating.

Stereotypically it is always a younger woman and older man or same-aged partners in a relationship, marriage and even dating choices. Truth be told, no matter how GEN ZEE we become, we still question ourselves before getting involved with an older woman. 

After years of growing up in a society where older men are normalized and celebrated in a relationship, dating an older woman is subconsciously challenging to many. 

But we also have to remember that age changes so many things inside us. Be it our sexuality, maturity, perspectives: age has a tendency to keep transforming people. That’s why before dating a woman 10 years older, a man should consider a few points to avoid any future clashes between their relationship.

Moreover, he must consider these points to check whether he can match the level of maturity, understanding, sexual need with her or not. Because these are the primary factors that build the foundation of happiness in any relationship.

In order to assist my readers to answer their subconscious questions about dating an older woman, here are facts to consider before you proceed.

Level Of Understanding

I went to India to attend a house party where I bumped into Maya. She is 36, a writer, and was working with a top newspaper publishing house in the country back then. During our conversation, I discovered that she is dating a guy nine years younger! 

To be honest, that’s rare in a society that has the stereotype of dating “older men” concept. 

The level of understanding she shared with her man was incredible to witness. Maya said, “Love doesn’t know any barrier. I started dating Raghav four years back, since then we have only grown better!”.

It is true if two people dating find the same level of understanding even with the difference of maturity, a relationship simply blooms. Elder women are often more mature than younger men they are dating. It becomes easy for the younger man to trust her more, eliminating the drama that comes along with jealousy, insecurity, and misunderstanding that are common otherwise. 

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Matching Sexual Requirements And Needs

The sexual needs of women bloom at a certain age, which is different from that of a man. Being a man, if you are planning to date a woman ten years older than you, it’s better to keep in mind that the sexual desires and needs may vary. Women hit their sexual peak around age forty. For men, it is often in the late twenties to early thirties. 

The positive side is that older women are often more relaxed and willing to experiment in bed with their partners. So in case, she is older, rest assured that she will bring in her calm, serene and relaxed version to you. The trick here for younger men is to be open to her being, rather than messing things up with heightened excitement and immaturity.

Stereotyped Bullet Comments

You definitely should go and date any woman you like, even if she is ten years older than you. However, when there is this big age gap, prepare yourself with a bold heart and intelligent, crystal clear mindset to ditch all those stereotyped comments coming your way.

You will notice your friends and family may even judge or warn you about being disappointed with your new date. Chances are their words will pierce your heart like bullets and you will keep second-guessing this otherwise beautiful connection with your woman just because she’s older than you. 

The Difference In The Romancing 

Romancing will be another new thing for younger men who are dating an older lady for the first time. Flowers and chocolates may work sometimes, but definitely, it will challenge my handsome men readers to offer more new, creative, and smarter ways to woo the lady of their dreams. 

It will not be those easy chatters and light flirty conversations, carnival fun time, or college romance thing. Dating an older woman will require deep interesting topics, world travel plans, constant challenges to match her level of better mature understanding, and emotional fulfillment. 

Planning For “Kids” Factor

This is something that I heard from Maya. Here are her words for you. “As I am the elder one in this relationship, people often go up to Raghav asking about our plans on raising children! You see, for me, it’s not obvious, I would love to be a mother someday, but how will that stop him from loving someone older?” Well, to be very honest, this simple concept is often left ignorant by society and our families sometimes. 

Dating is all cool, but as you are enquiring about dating an older woman, get ready for this “what about kids'' topic to come up. Maybe from your friends and definitely from your family! What about the future and what about raising kids with an older woman will always be a question mark. 

However, that is of course again a very personal choice for all couples. You’ll never be able to control words and situations coming in your way when you decide to date an older woman. The only thing you can do is, prepare yourself mentally and emotionally to be vocal and support your own decisions regarding your dating life. 

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The Perks Of Dating A 10 Year Older Woman

So as you know by now, How and what to consider before dating a ten year older woman, it is time for me to add some extra cherries to your cheesecake!

If that was not enough to gain you a clear picture of dating this older lady love you are vibing with. Here are some beautiful perks that I would simply love to add to your dating perception.

More Maturity 

In your dating life or relationship with an older woman, you can always expect more maturity no matter what the situation is. Elder women often bring very experienced, easy yet adventurous vibes with themselves to the relationship. You can always expect your relationship problems to be solved at once, without much drama. Her flow and perception are often value-adding. 

The same day after having a new and unique conversation with Maya, I headed to learn some new perspectives of dating from Raghav. The smile on his face said more than his words. I asked him about his love life and thoughts on dating an older woman, for 4+ years now. 

“I never looked at age as a barrier, but my experience with Maya is something words can never explain. She is mature, understanding, and accepting of every silly mistake I make in this relationship. I feel relaxed with her, there is no pressure to be someone else. Life with an older woman is more sorted than I thought!”

Deeper Conversations

Dating an older woman, you’ll never get bored. There’ll be more and more space for deep conversations on countless things that she has learned over the years. Her experiences, soulful words and maturity will often vibe as words of wisdom, earned from her experiences. 

There is always something new to learn from every challenging situation you may face in this relationship with her. Dear men, you will always have someone who will patiently listen to those endless stories that you have not yet revealed to the world. It is kind of “the home I was always searching for” as Raghav mentioned.

More Acceptance 

During my conversation with Raghav the most beautiful comment he made about his relationship with Maya, was about acceptance. “ The best thing about her is that she is very much open to accepting anything and everything about me, which I feel is rare! I have faced several questions about those little things I do in daily life in my previous relationships. With Maya, it is just easy to be me. There is a strange sense of freedom I found with her, no explanation, nothing.”

Acceptance is this I believe is a huge factor in relationships. The more you are open to accepting your partner, the more two people bloom in their relationship. Dating an older woman simply makes it easier. 

Better Understanding

When external challenges keep you from moving forward in life, she will be there to not only support but also motivate you to trail a path out of your problem. The thing with romancing a ten years older woman is that they simply have an enhanced understanding of problems, situations, and life in general. Men take time to get mature, but for women, maturity comes earlier. The perks of dating someone older than you come with their own set of advantages. 

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Respect Even In Differences

It is very obvious that with such an age gap of ten years, there will always be differences in mindset, perspectives, decision makings, and all other possible things that are spiraling in your mind right now. However, to make things work, it will require mutual respect and one another’s acceptance of what both you individuals are at the point of time in life. 

Of course, let me repeat, just like any other relationship, it will not be easy. But this so-called ‘easy stuff’ will never challenge you to get better and grow in a relationship.

Better Communication

Open and clear communication is the last thing on my list. The perks of dating an older woman will come to you with crystal clear communication. Communication is a very subtle skill most people lack. However, older women are just too sorted to clear any gap in communication in a relationship. Expect better, clear, and open conversation with your lady, which means lesser fights, drama, and misunderstanding again. 

I hope by now, all your questions about dating a ten years older woman are quite clear. Her age should never influence your decision about dating her or not. Age is just a number! If you feel the vibe is just right with her, one should go ahead and open their door to love after certain consideration about themselves.

Related Queires:

I hope these points just made it easier for you to make a decision and gave you a picture of how it feels to be with an older woman. Here are some frequently asked questions I often have to face when they think about dating older women.

Isn’t 8-10 years a huge age gap?

Tbh, yes, it is. But as I mentioned earlier, the age gap hardly matters in relationships if both persons share a good bonding and understand each other well. All you need to be in a relationship is understanding and mutual respect. If you have it, nothing like ‘huge age gap’ matters eventually.

Will it work in the long run?

Yeah, why not. Please don’t see it as something that’s not gonna last. If you begin your relationship with such negative thoughts, maybe these thoughts will end up pushing you to your break up. Always remember, if you can make it work, it will work in the long run. 

How to satisfy her need in bed?

Yeah, that’s indeed a matter of concern. Generally, older women tend to have more sexual needs than their younger partners. So, if you’re just an average man in bed and currently thinking of dating a woman 10 years older than you, I suggest reconsidering your thoughts. 

What’ll happen after she enters her menopause?

After she enters her menopause, indeed there will be effects on both your sex life and relationship. But at that time, she’ll expect you and you should be with her compromising on your sexual needs for that time and onwards. 

Will it be safe to have kids with her?

Yeah, there shouldn’t be any problem to have and raise kids with an older woman. Rather, most of the time, she’ll come forward and take most responsibilities being the elder one. 


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