You’re out with your girlfriends, having some drinks, dancing, and having a wonderful time. All of a sudden, you feel something on your shoulders.
You look up to see that a good friend of yours has put his arm around you as he talks to a guy. Before you can say anything, this man turns to you and says, “I’ve got your back.”
If you have trouble understanding a man, you’re not alone.
When you were dating, did you ever wonder, “What does it mean when a guy defends me from my sister?” or “How does he really feel about my best friend?”
Understanding a man is kind of like understanding a woman. There are certain body language cues that are universal to us all.
Here What It Means When A Guy Defends you
So, you’ve been trying to figure out what it means when a guy defends you.
But you don’t want to ask him out because you don’t want to look desperate.
Well, we can solve that problem for you through this article so just read on.
#1 Biological Instinct To Protect
A man’s need to protect you is as essential to him as your desire to be independent. Both of these things can coexist and complement each other.
When a man protects you, it does not mean he doesn’t trust you or that he thinks you are incapable of handling things on your own.
It simply means that he wants to respond to his most basic instincts and protect something worth protecting.
No matter how independent and strong you are, it’s hard to deny the satisfaction you get from a man taking care of you.
That’s because there’s a feminine side inside every girl, and your knight in shining armor calls on this feminine energy.
It’s a pretty natural need to feel protected and cared for by someone who loves you – but we typically feel awkward about expressing these desires.
It is easy to resist the help of others. We wander around thinking we don’t need any help, but it’s just not true. It takes a brave and mature woman to allow others to provide the help she knows she needs.
So, yes, there is a time for you to let your guard down and trust in them. Because how safe does it feel when a guy defends you from harm?
#2 He Being Chivalrous
Chivalry is not dead, but gentlemen these days don’t practice it so much as women just want them to be more independent and open.
Someone defending you means he is chivalrous, has the values of a gentleman, and believes in standing up for what is right.
This is a good quality that not many people have these days.
The guy might appear to be a real gentleman: protecting you from anything, defending anything that could hurt you, and putting your needs above his.
Whoever decides to defend you will value you enough to fight for you and make sure that justice is served. He’s a person you can count on, a person who won’t back down.
If someone defends us, we should also show our appreciation and thank them for what they did because it wasn’t easy defending us.
#3 He Stands For What Is Right
In the case of a guy defending you when it has nothing to do with the relationship he has with you, it simply shows that he always stands up for what’s right.
It is a great quality to have, and if you have someone who possesses such a trait, you can be sure that they’re like no other.
Even if a stranger is right to him, he will always be there for them.
Even if the person is not a friend or in any way connected to you, he will make sure the person is okay.
He may not even care for them personally, but he believes everyone deserves a chance to defend themselves.
It’s a rare quality that can only be found in an amazing guy that you should hang on to as long as possible!
#4 He Values Your Friendship
If someone defends you, it means they want to protect you because they love you and defend your honor because what you say and do is special.
It is always a good thing when someone cares about your well-being. If someone defends you by standing up to the people talking behind your back or criticizing you, it is a good sign that they care about you.
Because he defends you in all situations does not mean he likes you more. It means he values your friendship.
Your friend steps in and defends you despite how silly the situation is. They are just standing up for you and want you to be happy.
He doesn’t want anything to ruin what you’ve built and will try to take care of any uncertainties so you both can move on with life.
#5 He Truly Likes You
There’s a higher chance he likes you if he starts to defend you from any attacking parties. It’s like a knight in shining armor coming to rescue the damsel in distress-only this is what your guy is doing for you.
It means that he feels so strongly about you that he’s willing to put himself out there and risk possible disapproval from other people by standing up for what he believes in.
And if this is the case, it could mean good things for you two.
Of course, if he is doing it casually, then it could be that he doesn’t actually like you so much.
But if he defends you in a passionate and sincere manner, then there’s something between the both of you two, and it might be worth exploring and pursuing further.
You can talk to him and see how he reacts to what you are saying.
Times When A Guy Defending You Can Go WRONG
You have heard it before. When a guy defends you, some people in the relationship say that it is a red flag.
When girls discuss this topic, they often talk about a guy always being her knight and radiate.
While there is a romantic side to that image, it should not necessarily be true every time.
He defends you because he perceives you as are weak
You have found a guy head over heels in love with you.
But, he wants to take care of the details for you, just because he is convinced that you cannot do it all by yourself, which makes him feel he must defend you all the time.
However, having someone defend you can be a red flag.
He might always have the urge to protect you and claim to be your knight in shining armor because he feels that you cannot stand up for yourself.
This is never the image that you want others to think of you, right?
This can be very bad because this will make others think negatively about you.
He’s overprotective about you
When a guy is always fighting battles for you and defending you, it may be that he tends to control every situation.
He may be over-protective, control the situation more than necessary, and will put pressure on you in one way or another.
If he never lets you make decisions for yourself, acts in an offensive way towards others, and does not let you speak freely, there are some problems that will probably ruin your relationship forever.
Pro Tip: You have to understand that nobody has the right to take over your life and make you do things that you have not approved of. In the end, it will go wrong when there are big fights and disagreements between the couple. They won’t handle it any longer and end up in a breakup.
He wants to run the whole show their way
Having a boyfriend or husband who always wanted to defend you means that he is this overprotective type of person.
Having some guy fight your battles for you when you are perfectly capable of doing so yourself is a big turn-off.
Not only are they controlling and possessive, but they keep an eye on your every move and want to run the whole show their way.
Men like these usually have extremely jealous tendencies, and even if it is mildly, there then there is no guarantee that it will remain like this for long.
The man may tend to get more possessive with time. As far as the relationship’s future is concerned, things might not be looking too bright here.
How To Refrain Him From Defending You, When You Are Capable Of Doing That?
Even though it is a good feeling to be protected by your loved ones all the time, sometimes, it becomes very frustrating too.
It feels great that someone is always there to protect you in every fight, but sometimes you love to work through the tough situations yourself.
We all have that one person in our lives who thinks they are the hero, and they need to jump in and save you all the time.
You would be lying if you say you aren’t grateful that they do so, but there comes a time when it feels suffocating.
Sometimes you just want to defend yourself in your own hands and not rely on someone else for everything.
How Can You Make Him Understand That It’s Not Bad If He Leaves You Alone Sometimes?
Here is how you can explain it to him; tell him that even though you love it when he defends and protects you, your ultimate goal as a couple should be self-sufficiency.
If he understands this as well, things will get much better between the two of you.
Try explaining this to him one on one without being offensive, as it will come across better.
Don’t get disturbed; instead, let him know that you appreciate his intentions, but sometimes you would love to fight yourself.
Conversation Template: “Hey, big fella. I want you to stop protecting me all the time. I love that you’re always defending me and caring for me. But sometimes, I wish you let me fight my own battles. It feels like I’m in a cotton candy cocoon, constantly under your protection and care.”
In Conclusion
One of the top signs your boyfriend loves you is when he defends you from other people’s judgment.
He wants to know what you’re thinking and might playfully challenge your opinions.
It means he cares about your opinions, but he wants to make sure you have a good reason for having them.
Though there are times that we get used to defending our partners, it’s just a sign that they couldn’t do it on their own.
There is no need for an excessive amount of defending unless the person needs your help, but even then, it should not affect the relationship negatively.
