Love is a mystery. You never know what’s going to unfold in front of you. When even the sweetest moment can turn into the bitter one, that’s not in your control. And the mystery of love continues to surprise every lover in the world.
When I ask my friends who are in a relationship to tell me some interesting facts about a relationship or love in general, they consistently mention trust, commitment, communication, loyalty, compatibility, and not to forget jealousy. Yes, with all that good stuff, love comes with some bitter stuff.
And we can’t ignore jealousy. Tell me honestly, who likes when their partner flirts with anyone else? You ought to be jealous, right? However, some might argue that if your partner is loyal to you, there is no need to be jealous.
But what if it’s a complicated situation and you don’t understand the reason for their jealousy?
When you are in a relationship, it’s easy to understand why your partner can get jealous for specific reasons; if you two like each other and are aware of each other’s feelings, you know what can make him or her a little bit jealous. But if you are neither of this situation, what is the real reason for their jealousy?
There can be several reasons when he tries to make you jealous, but he actually doesn’t want you. This depends on many factors. What kind of relationship do you share with him? Is he your friend or an acquaintance? Although he is already in a relationship, do you have a crush on him? So, before you jump to any conclusions, you need to know where you stand in terms of your relationship with him. The kind of vibe you share with him will help you determine the right reason.
So, before you create a mess in your head trying to figure out what may be the possible reasons for behaving like this, let’s get into the reasons straight away.
8 Reasons If He Doesn’t Want Me, Why Is He Trying To Make Me Jealous?
Jealousy is a part of every relationship. Ask any random person, each of them has surely experienced jealousy in different forms at various stages of their life. Sometimes it’s hard to define jealousy because of its complex nature.
You can feel jealous when you see your long-term boyfriend talking to his female co-worker; you can get jealous if your best friend spends time with a new friend but you. Although you know very well that you hold an extraordinary place in your partner’s heart and mind, jealousy can take control of your mind at any time.
#1 He Is In A Long-Distance Relationship
We are all aware of the famous quote, “ Distance makes your heart grow fonder”. It does, but how can we forget that famous saying, “ Out of sight, out of mind”. So, basically, it’s like the two sides of the coin.
If you like a guy who is in a long-distance relationship, you can come across such behavior from him. He is away from his girlfriend, he probably meets her once or twice a month, and his mind sometimes forgets her presence.
He knows that you like him, but he is in a relationship. He is very aware that he can’t get you because you obviously won’t want a disloyal boyfriend who cheats on his girlfriend.
Yet, he likes to make you jealous, so he gets the missing attention because of his LDR. He has something to look forward to; he knows a girl wants him, which flatters him.
This kind of behavior arises from loneliness and detachment from partners.
#2 He Is An Attention Seeker
We all know that one guy loves to have attention by hook or crook. If getting attention means going out of the way and doing something stupid, he won’t even hesitate to do that.
So, he is that guy who is not interested in you, who will never get serious with you; he only enjoys the fact that you like him and you feel jealous. He loves how you get anxious, start asking his friends about his whereabouts, you call him continuously, etc.
He likes being talked about. Your worry, your jealousy give him an unparallel satisfaction. You would notice that he will make you more jealous whenever his friends are around only to gain more attention from you.
If you’re busy having fun with your friends, he will make sure to do something to divert your attention to him. He is only desiring attention and not you.
#3 He Is A Playboy
He is that playboy who loves counting how many female followers he gets. He will spend some time with you; he will give you flowers and chocolates and woo you with all sweet gestures and romantic words. But he isn’t serious about you, and he will never get into a relationship with you.
If he sees that you are not giving him attention or understand his real motive, he will be jealous. He doesn’t want to lose his female fan base, right? It’s a matter of pride for him that so many girls are chasing him while he isn’t into any of them.
He will boast in his friend circle about his popularity and how his moves make you jealous. He is a playboy with no heart, and he doesn’t think twice before breaking a girl’s heart.
#4 He Is Unhappy In His Relationship
Not all relationships are a bed of roses. Every couple goes through that rough patch in their lives. Sometimes, couples sail through the relationship even when they are unhappy.
If this guy happens to be the unfortunate one who isn’t happy in his relationship, he will attempt to do so. He knows that he can’t back out of his relationship all of a sudden; he can’t leave his current girlfriend without any proper reason.
But he knows that you get jealous by his gestures and moves, which satisfies his soul. The lack of love and the constant grumpy and sad mood vanishes when he successfully makes you jealous. He gets to distract his mind from an unhappy relationship by doing such stupid things.
#5 He Is Testing His Girlfriend
Guys can be perplexing too. The possessive and insecure boyfriends always look for something or the other to trouble their girlfriend.
I have often heard from my friends that whenever a girlfriend is outgoing or has a job that requires her to meet with new people, the partner often gets insecure. Even some boyfriends feel quite unworthy when their girlfriend earns more than him or people in general like her more because of her personality.
So, he is that guy who is not secure about his girlfriend. He wants to make sure that his girlfriend is only his, and she devotes her full time and attention to only him. He wants to keep his girlfriend and use you as bait.
He will try to make you jealous to keep you invested in himself. If you have the slightest feeling for him, you would feel jealous and pay more attention to him. He will use this to trouble his girlfriend even more.
He will constantly say to her that he already has a lover, and if she does not behave according to his terms and conditions, he will end the relationship.
#6 He Is Taking Revenge
Our pasts can be painful. They dwell in our hearts for many years, even if we feel that it’s gone forever. If you have rejected this guy in the past or hurt him by any means, now it’s his turn to return the same.
Perhaps you have realized that you have feelings for him over the years. Now when you have confessed your feelings to him, he is not interested in you anymore. But he won’t say that to you directly.
He has got a chance to play with your feelings. He will now take his sweet revenge to make you feel jealous. He wishes to enjoy this whole process. He has no interest in being in a relationship with you.
#7 He Is Confused
He is not clear in his head about his wants and desires. He is going through a phase of confusion, and the only way to clear his head is to test you.
He tries to make you feel jealous to see whether you react to it. If you respond to his tactics, that means you have feelings for him. You only get jealous when you have a soft corner for a guy.
Depending on your reaction, he will make up his mind. He feels for you but is unsure whether his feelings are true for you or just an infatuation. So, your positive or negative reaction will give him a direction.
#8 He Is Testing His Worth In The Market
It sounds creepy and lame; I totally agree. But believe me, there are plenty of guys who would make girls jealous to know if they still have their charm.
Am I still desirable to women? -that’s the question running around his mind. He is not here for a committed relationship; he only enjoys flirting and casual dating. And the real intention behind this is to see whether girls still chase him.
So, he will try out various tactics to get your attention, to make you jealous so that he can puff up his chest and say, “See, girls still fall for me even when I don’t want them in my life.”
What Are Ways That He Can Make You Feel Jealous?
While jealousy is a complex emotion, making someone jealous is also a skill. And some people are pretty skilled. Since his only intention is to make you jealous while he has no interest in you, he can adopt various ways to make you jealous. So, let’s find those ways.
- He will not reply to your text while he is online. He wants to show you that he is busy talking to other people or rather “girls”, hence he can’t reply immediately.
- He will talk to that girl you dislike the most. This is simple bait. You will be jealous when you see he spends a lot of time with a girl you don’t like.
- He will post stories on Instagram and Snapchat with other girls. Seeing his pictures with other girls will make you jealous to different levels, and that’s what he wants precisely.
- He will share screenshots of his long calls with others with you. This is a deliberate move to show you that he has been talking to someone else for so long.
- He will not tell you his plans, but others will know. You will feel left out because he does not even bother to tell you about his plans.
- He will take other girls with him for parties and movies but not you. If you two are invited to a party, and he does not take you there intentionally, he is only making you jealous.
- He will wish other people on their birthdays and post stories but not you. Once again, he is using this sly move to make you jealous.
- He will cancel plans with you at the last moment but go out with his friends. He will show you that there was an emergency, and hence he canceled the plan. But actually, he is going out and having fun.
- He will be extra friendly and extra sweet to girls. Friendships are okay to a certain limit. When he gets all touchy-feely with other girls, you should feel jealous.
- He will like and comment on others’ pictures but not on yours.
- He will invite friends to his house parties or family functions but not you.
Now that you know the different ways he can make you feel jealous, you would want to know how to tackle this situation.
What Should You Do When He Doesn’t Want You But Tries To Make You Jealous?
Not everything is under his control. Let’s know how you can give him a piece of his taste.
- Understand his real motive:
You need to understand what he actually wants. You can stop reacting to his behavior once you know that he is only doing it for attention or just because he is feeling lonely in his LDR.
- Do a background check:
Trust can make or break anything. So doing a background check or knowing everything about that guy is very important. Go through his social media profiles, talk to his friends and get to know the natural person.
- Counterattack him:
If he is making you jealous, you do the same to him. You talk to other guys, hang out with them, and post pictures. If these things don’t bother him, you can be assured that he isn’t into you.
- Think rationally:
So, you know that he doesn’t want you, then why would you feel jealous? Stop reacting to his moves and tactics. Do not let him win. The more you ignore him, the more you will get to know his true self quickly.
- Engage yourself:
Jealousy can mess up your mental balance to an inexplicable extent. So, do something you like, engage yourself in yoga, swimming, journaling, Zumba, etc. Keep your mind active.
- Block him:
This is the final option for you. You can’t stop feeling jealous when you know that he does not want you yet; you need to block him. Block him from all social media platforms so that you can’t see a single activity. Your mind will gradually get rid of his memories.
Is There A Chance Of Getting Him?
Let me ask you, would you want a guy to be your partner who does not want you in their life yet make you feel jealous? What does this say about the boy’s mentality? Doesn’t he come across as a narcissist, a self-obsessed person?
Well, if you still feel that you must give him a try, ask him directly. Have an honest conversation with him, tell him about your feelings. Wait for his reactions. If he admits his mistake, you can give him a chance. And if you see that he directly tells you that he will never be interested in you, you can move on.
Let’s Wrap It Up
Our hearts are full of emotions and sentiments. And you never know which emotion will take control of you. So before you let jealousy rule your heart and make your life more complex, think logically.
Do not attempt to do anything stupid out of jealousy. The outcome will only hurt you. Take time, and listen to your head this time. Sometimes, the right direction of our hearts can only be found through our heads.