The Female Mind Control Handbook
Time does indeed heal all wounds. When your ex is happy, excited, and loving life with their new date, it can be hard to cope. There's no easy way around a breakup.
You will always experience a complicated mix of sadness, regret, and relief – no matter who leaves – and it can be challenging to navigate through these feelings. It helps to let yourself feel your feelings, accept that this is a tough time, and allow yourself time to grieve.
Regardless of how it occurs, moving forward is unavoidable if you want to continue living a meaningful life. It might not feel good thinking about your ex being happy, but it also doesn't feel good thinking about your ex being miserable, so why do it? We will never be perfect, but we can find ways to cope that work best for us in our unique situation with some trial and error. In the end, you will move on happier and healthier.
Your ex has moved on. You've tried to move on. No matter how hard you try, you can't seem to make yourself move on to the next person. Your memories are fighting back, keeping you stuck in the past where misery is your closest companion.
Why Does Your Ex Move On Fast?
It's not easy to believe someone you love is over you, but logically thinking about the reasons why exes move on so fast can help you understand and accept it.
- Moving on right away shows that there was not enough love, respect, and willingness to bond in the relationship.
- As for someone who moves on right away, it is clear that they were not really into you. When they were attracted to you, they were not capable of filling the void in their lives with you.
- Maybe he or she doesn’t want anything serious right now. Or perhaps he or she isn’t at a place in life where he or she can have a serious relationship right now.
- Most people are busy these days, building their careers, trying to carve out time for themselves. It’s not that they don’t care; it’s just that their life is happening right now.
- Exes who move on so fast after a breakup may be experiencing an emotional roller coaster, so they try to distract themselves from their painful thoughts by participating in as many activities as possible. In short, moving on as quickly as possible is a way to soothe those wounds.
[You Are Ahead Of Your Ex] Do You Know What Happens When Your Ex Move On Fast?
If you find out that your ex is seeing someone else already, this might seem like it makes your ex even more desirable. You might think, Wow! My ex must be over me to be moving on so fast. Wrong.
When an ex moves on quickly, there are certain things I think the ex has decided not to work on.
- Your ex is not taking responsibility for their part in the breakup and is refusing to change to be a healthier and happier person who can sustain a healthy and happy relationship.
- Your ex had moved on quickly because he or she didn’t want to deal with the feelings stirred up when you broke up.
- Genuine self-reflection is necessary to grow as a person. It means they still haven’t dealt with what went wrong in your relationship and are avoiding looking at themselves and taking responsibility for their role in the relationship ending.
- Unfortunately, this sort of behavior generally leads to the same issues that the two people had with each other before.
Being the person who moves on too fast makes you a risk to have this happen again. Sometimes it can be because of a lack of self-awareness; other times, it can be a defense mechanism to help cope with a past hurt.
How Do You Deal With Your EX Moving on FAST?
Today, I'm going to show you the right way to deal with being left by your ex that will allow you to heal quickly and move on with your life so that you can have your fairytale ending after all!
#1 [The Most IMPORTANT] Detach Yourself From The Attachments Of Your Relationship
So, where does this fear of having your ex move on fast come from?
It's because you were attached, and now you are afraid your security attachment might get broken.
Yes, it's normal to miss your ex. Here's why: You built a sense of attachment to feeling safe and secure when you were in a relationship. That sense of attachment will remain in a persistent way even when a relationship ends.
After a breakup, it's easy to go into panic mode and wonder if you'll ever find another person who will love you.
What you're feeling is not unusual, nor are your emotions beyond repair. Together, let's find out what you're actually feeling and how to help you move on past your breakup.
Understanding that emotions like loneliness are usual ways to handle grief helps you detach from the emotional roller coaster ride that comes after breakups. It's also hard not to take breakups personally, but learning how to respond with awareness and care for yourself (without judging yourself) can help make better after-relationship decisions.
With that in mind, I'd like to help you start dealing with the process of getting over an ex by helping you make the proper steps in moving forward.
#2 [Our Favorite] No Contact Rule
No contact is less of an effort than you might think. It's all in the attitude. Maybe you still have questions, thoughts, or fears, but by keeping yourself occupied with friends and not contacting your ex's belongings, you will increase your chances of recovery from a breakup.
Not only is it brilliant, but it's practically necessary when you break up with someone. When you give yourself time to process what happened, you lessen the chance of worrying about what might have been.
Pro Tip: If he contacts you, feign disinterest and tell him you're focusing on yourself and your great new life and that there is no room for him in it. Cut off all contact with everyone your ex knows if that helps, too.
#3 Heal Before You ‘Fill The Gap”
Take the time you need to heal from a breakup, from a relationship gone wrong, from a divorce, from whatever ended badly. It's important not to make the same mistakes. The right person will be worth it!
You shouldn't rush into another relationship, either. Sometimes things are awkward for a while after you break up with someone, especially if you were together for a long time. Wait until you feel 100% ready to start dating again because it's not fair to your next partner to come along and have to compete with all the good times you shared with your ex. Everyone deserves an equal chance!
Pro Tip: Being single doesn't have to be a drag. In fact, if you approach it from the right state of mind, being single is a time to shine and an opportunity to grow as an individual. It can make you a better person and pave the way for a healthy relationship in the future.
#4 [Distinctly Effective] Infuse Practicing Mindfulness In Your Daily Routine
Mindfulness is being aware of what's really going on inside you. Mindfulness is all about learning to stay present with whatever emotions you're experiencing - that means feeling whatever you feel without panic, anxiety, or distraction.
Instead of being distracted or consumed with anxious thoughts during your breakup, you stay focused on the present moment, which helps you feel more at ease.
When you pay close and non-judgemental attention to your thoughts and experiences as they happen, you become more aware of the moment. This creates space between your reactions and what's happening so that you can respond rather than react.
Mindfulness is a fantastic tool for healing from your breakup because it helps to regulate your emotions.
#5 Feel The Pain To Heal
To begin your healing, allow yourself to feel the pain. Feeling heartbroken and betrayed is like having a bad cold: the only cure is getting through it and being well again. Before you can begin to feel better, you have to accept your situation. Allow yourself to cry and punch the air. This is a natural release of pain. You need it. If you can allow yourself to meditate simultaneously, that will speed up the process, and you will feel even better after.
Think of your affirmations as story starters. Affirmations allow you to get yourself back on the right page fast. Affirmations do more than just get you out of a downward spiral. They will create mental pictures of your new identity. These pictures will then support your change of image and behavior, reinforcing your new attitude.
Positive affirmations that you can practice to heal from your past:
- We all have feelings that we can’t explain. When it happens, I will not let these feelings overpower me.
- It’s hard to keep on going sometimes, but I know that I will be okay. Happiness is the most important thing to me, and sometimes that means that I have to let go of things that hurt me.
- I have not failed in life because of my breakup; I have succeeded in living happily because of it.
After you've had some time to grieve, explore what you can learn from the experience. This will help you feel better in the future when faced with similar situations.
#6 Confide In Supportive Friends, Family, Or Group
Getting over a breakup is an emotional roller coaster. Don't feel doomed by the inevitable sadness. A lot of your energy will get spent on lost love, but give yourself space to heal through physical activity, positive daily habits, and quality time with your support group.
Do you know how having a support network of your family and friends is an excellent way to get over a breakup? It's essential to surround yourself with people who truly care about you and want to help. With friends and family by your side, you can recover from the trauma of breakup and find happiness again!
Confide in supportive friends who give you the space to acknowledge your feelings without taking them personally. You can even make new friends when you go out on a specific mission to meet someone else who is going through the same thing as you! It feels good to know you're not alone!
If your ex feels like you're getting on with your life and not letting them affect you as much, they might be inclined to miss you more and eventually come back. They will see how happy you are and realize what they lost. That's the hope anyway!
#7 Be Physically And Mentally Fit
Each breakup is a unique experience, but there are always lessons that we can learn from the whole ordeal. Breakups don't have to be an emotional minefield that we need to avoid or endure. They're actually an opportunity for self-discovery and personal growth.
If you're willing to look for these lessons, breakups can even be enjoyable and exciting.
Health comes first. Okay, maybe that is a little harsh, but think about the last time you saw your ex with someone else. You probably didn't feel so hot. So get in shape! I'm not saying get crazy thin or musclebound. Just get yourself healthy. Eating right and working out are the basics. But why? What is the science behind it?
Let the rest fall in place. You put too much effort into your relationships. It's time you find new things to make your life worth it. Take yourself out of that situation you don't want anymore and spend some time on things that will liven up your world.
To be inspired, re-ignite your passion for the things that are important to you; you need to change your surroundings. Go out with friends, volunteer, travel, immerse yourself in creative activities, and push yourself beyond your comfort zone.
Go after your goals with everything you've got, and see where the chips fall.
#8 Let Go Of The Burdens And Move On
Letting go of the past can feel paradoxical, but I also find it incredibly freeing. It's the opposite of wallowing in misery, recriminations, and pining for what once was. It means letting go of unfair expectations and unrealistic hopes. It means changing your focus from worrying about the things you've lost to taking care of yourself now, without losing hope for the future.
Don't be afraid to be different. Let go of the burdens of the past and move on. Learn from your mistakes and move on to a better you. It might be hard at first, but once you start, you'll realize how much fun it is to do something different for a change. You'll also see that the world doesn't end at your doorstep.
Your ex may well not be right for you; you might not be right for them. Some relationships don't work out. What does matter is that you did your best, you cared, and you treated each other with respect. If this relationship did not lead to a long-term commitment, you still have a good memory of a time when there was love and happiness in your life.
But it is possible to heal after a breakup and to find happiness. It may take time, but it's worth working towards.
The days and weeks pass. The pain dulls a little bit. You experience a growing distance between yourself and your ex. You notice the pleasure of doing things you love to do. You feel happiness, contentment, pleasure, excitement, joy, enthusiasm, bliss even. You experience glimpses of a future that feels vibrant and alive inside of you again.