You’ve heard it all before. “ I don’t want to talk about my feelings.” “I am afraid of commitment.”
But while these sentences sound familiar, handling the situation can always feel like an uphill task. How do you deal with a man who doesn’t want a relationship with you? Do you cut him off?
The simple answer? It depends. And if you feel you should, don’t expect this to happen at the snap of your fingers.
Cutting off a man you felt strongly for is going to be a process and here’s what you can do to make it easier.
What Should You Do When He Says Doesn’t Want a Relationship With You?
Accept that He Doesn’t Want a Serious Relationship With You
The first and most painful step in the scenario is acceptance. It’s okay to realize that you and the man you fell for, are not on the same page. When men don’t want a serious relationship, they make their feelings known.
If the guy tells you he doesn’t want a long term relationship and is only into casual relationships believe him. And while that might make your heart sink at first, acceptance is the key to healthy romantic relationships.
Sometimes, despite the chemistry, men are just looking for casual sex. And while that is a hard pill to swallow for most women, it’s best to keep your self esteem intact and move forward knowing that you wanted different things in your dating life.
Understand Where You Went Wrong
If you were expecting a committed relationship with this guy, but that didn’t happen clearly there was miscommunication. It’s time to take charge of your own life, backtrack and see where the potential romantic relationship fell apart.
If a man does not take a relationship forward with you, it’s not always because he is not a nice guy. Sometimes, men are just looking for a casual relationship, or let’s say a fling but women misread the signs.
Here are a few things you can evaluate to learn from this experience:
- See if you misread signs in your past relationships
- Try to spot the indications and hints you received to see if he ever pointed towards having a real relationship
- Does the same guy have a history of flirting with other women and leaving them without commitments? You might want to look into his previous relationships and check for the same situation
Self reflection in the early stages can always be a great learning experience. This doesn’t mean that you are not an amazing woman and are to blame here, but learning lessons help save precious time in the future.
It’s also a good sign for personal development. Never settle for less or be the other girl in a man’s life.
Don’t Let this Situation Affect Your Self Esteem
It’s very common for situations like this to affect your self confidence. But trust us, losing a guy before the start of a passionate relationship is actually much better than losing a good guy down the road.
And more often than not, this doesn’t mean you are missing any qualities. Sometimes men are just looking for a booty call and run the other way at the mention of a monogamous relationship.
Often, men are playing games and just casually date many women to keep themselves entertained.
Infact, use this as an ego boost and try your luck with other guys. Only you can make yourself truly happy, so don’t let the absence of a serious commitment bog you down or make you lose your self respect.
It’s also possible that if things are meant to be, one day he’ll realize that he has strong feelings for you and you are in fact, girlfriend material. Trust the process. In the end, everything makes sense.
Be Very Clear On What You Want (Is it A Committed Relationship?)
No relationship expert can guide you better than your own heart and mind. It often helps to have self control and clarity on what you are looking for with the right person.
So if you have been exploring the dating pool, casually dating or just started talking to a guy, now is the time to set your goals. Watch out for any obvious red flag.
If possible, also use learnings from your last relationship or other relationships of those around you to do and be better. Try to avoid giving or getting mixed signals since those are just time wasters with no point.
Be Willing To Cut Contact
Life can look pretty fantastic when you start dating. Spending time, enjoying life and perhaps a great friendship are all great elements of a romantic equation.
But if the person you thought you liked doesn’t feel how you do, don’t make a big deal out of it and be willing to cut him off. The perfect partner will not only spend time with you, he will also make each moment special.
The same way, a man who is not interested will spend lots of time with other girls, probably won’t notice the new guy in your life and will generally show no interest. It’s time to let go of this man and wield power over your heart.
So once you have thought things through, reflected on the situation and you are sure that the man is not into you, it’s probably best to get distance and cut him off.
Wrapping it Up
It’s not easy to come to terms with the fact that the man of your dreams is not willing to pursue romance with you. In fact, it can be a very challenging situation to be in.
But the real question is, should you cut a man off for not wanting to pursue something serious with you? Yes, you should definitely get some distance. But cutting someone off isn’t easy so follow the due process and take things easy.
Frequently Asked Questions
Should you wait for someone or move on?
It’s okay to wait for someone you like till they are ready unless you want to see other people.
How do you know when to cut a guy off?
If he is no longer interested and doesn’t show up to see you, it’s probably time to cut him off.
